|My best-est friend and I on our seventeenth birthday, baking a rainbow cake! I'm the one wearing the unbelievably sexy apron. I believe the sepia-tones convey a feeling of feel-good-movie-good-timey-times.|
My twin sister, Maia, is the funniest, smartest, most caring, greatest person on planet Earth. Of course, everything you ever saw in The Parent Trap about twins is a lie. Actually, Sister Sister and The Suite Life of Zack and Cody are pretty accurate, but that's pretty much it as far as true-to-life interpretations of twin-dom go. I'd like to think of this post as a convenient guide to knowing twins, and being friends with twins. Never again shall you recklessly utter the phrase, "WHOA YOU GUYS ARE TWINS?!" because you will have all of this sparkly new knowledge in your brain that will make you look cool, calm, and collected in our mind-boggling presence. KNEEL PEASANTS. 'TIS EDUCATION TIME. Man, I hate reading Shakespeare in AP Literature.
Things to Remember While in the Presence of Twins
- Twins are not circus animals - We are just brothers or sisters born on the same day with the same face. Once we're born, the inescapable similarities end. You've gotta believe in nurture over nature here, because its the way we're raised and the way society regards us that makes us any bit the same. If we were brought up under different households, we probably wouldn't be very similar at all. Take your own siblings for instance. You people must be similar in one aspect or another, because the same parents raised you! Now add in the same age, friends, life experiences, and teachers and viola! You have twins! Twin telepathy is a silly myth, since two unrelated friends in the same place doing the same thing are often thinking the same thing anyway. No one can read your thoughts over long distances, so relax. You know, unless you're BFF's with Edward Cullen.
- We really don't care if you mix us up - There is no need to get all giggly and embarrassed if you call one of us by the wrong name, because everyone does it. Putting names to faces will come to you after a while. Really, though, even our parents mix us up sometimes on the phone. I think pets are the best at this type of thing. Take a page out of their book and stop going by physical appearance, and pay more attention to personality and gestures. I even mix the two of us up in pictures. I EVEN MIX UP OTHER PAIRS OF TWINS. Just play it off, no big deal! It happens all the time!
- Twins are two, separate, (awesome!) people - Maia and I are like day and night in some respects. We both love being silly, and we both get good grades, but that's about it. I'm into art; she's into science. I'm into crazy clothes; she's into business casual. I troll Youtube and Blogger; she reads Jane Austen. I play the guitar; she plays the piano! Do you see? Please don't feel that it's necessary to buy both of us the exact same birthday gift. We are two totally separate people, so exercise your creativity and feel the joy of buying two different gifts! It was really boring to play Barbies with my sister when we had two of every doll. And I never EVER want any of you guys to talk about dating a pair of twins at once. That NEVER happens outside of television, so keep dreaming, That's creepy and disrespectful of you anyway.
- Don't try and pull us apart out of friendship-jealousy - This has happened to us so many times it's ridiculous. We're so attuned to friends jealous of our closeness, we will be able to spot your jealousy a mile away! So don't even try it. Don't spread rumors about one twin to the other, because we tell each other EVERYTHING. We might even pretend that we don't notice you obviously trying to come between us, just for our own entertainment to see how long and how far you're willing to humiliate yourself! We're best friends that live together, DEAL WITH IT. It's not like there's no room for any more friends! You just can't surpass my twin sister! No one can, so don't waste your time tryin'. We've known each other literally all our lives, and I'll never know anyone better!
Now, go befriend yourselves some twins! You'll never go back once you do!
Hey, it's almost Spring Break here!
Which means it's time to panic about Senior Prom and graduation!
AND HOLY JOE JONAS, COLLEGE IS RIGHT AROUND THE CORNER TRALALALALAaaahhhh!!!!!!!
*falls down a flight of stairs arbitrarily*
|A reference to my favorite movie seemed appropriate. Zooey D. Come on, you guys.|
The Queen of Panicking
and also of Red Velvet Pancakes from IHOP
man those things are amazing
Y'all better get over there and try that sh*t